V. A. To Have, Give All to All, P 5
5 The Holy Spirit, Who leads to God, translates communication into being, just as He ultimately translates perception into knowledge. You do not lose what you communicate. The ego uses the body for attack, for pleasure and for pride. The insanity of this perception makes it a fearful one indeed. The Holy Spirit sees the body only as a means of communication, and because communicating is sharing it becomes communion. Perhaps you think that fear as well as love can be communicated; and therefore can be shared. Yet this is not so real as it may appear. Those who communicate fear are promoting attack, and attack always breaks communication, making it impossible. Egos do join together in temporary allegiance, but always for what each one can get separately. The Holy Spirit communicates only what each one can give to all. He never takes anything back, because He wants you to keep it. Therefore, His teaching begins with the lesson:
To have, give all to all.
I don’t need to be convinced that I misused the body, and still do, though I am changing my mind about that. I wanted it to present to the world this strong willed person who is in charge of her life. That is why I spent so much of my life trying to mold it into what I perceived as a body that represented this image I wanted to project. I tried to keep it a certain shape and size.
I wanted my hair to look like the shampoo models and my skin to be smooth and flawless like the make-up models. I can’t tell you the time, money and effort spent toward this goal. Even if I could have achieved it, what would I have really achieved, anyway? That I am the maker of my self? That I am a better maker of self than others? Is that communication? Or is that separation?
I seem to be losing my desire to misuse my body. It is not a done deal, yet, but I feel differently about it now and I am looking forward to seeing how this unfolds. I am no longer obsessed with my weight, though I haven’t completely lost interest in it. I used to stand in front of the mirror and wonder what I could do with this body to make it more appealing, to attract people to me. Now I sometimes forget to look at all and at the end of the day realize I didn’t comb my hair. Looking for some balance here. Ha ha.
I am now a lot more interested in using the body for true communication and though I don’t understand this completely, I know I will because it is God’s Will and now it is my will, too. I spend some time each morning working in my journal and sharing what I get. I think maybe this is true communication because there is no ulterior motive. I don’t do it to look holy or to prove I am a better student or more spiritual than someone else. I do it because that is what I am supposed to do. I do it out of love.
I communicate during the day when I see past someone’s behavior to the Christ within. I communicate when I respond to attack, not with defense, but with compassion and understanding. I communicate when I express love to whoever is in front of me or in my thoughts, rather than to those special few who I designate as “loved ones.” I don’t do any of this perfectly, but I do it as consistently as I can, and when I notice that I am not doing it, I ask for and accept the Atonement for it.
How do I give all to all? I give love to everyone in every circumstance. Love will take whatever form is needed as long as I am allowing it to flow through me and I am not trying to direct it myself. This is my desire and my commitment.