V. C. Be Vigilant Only for God and His Kingdom, P 10
10 The third step, then, is a statement of what you want to believe, and entails a willingness to relinquish everything else. The Holy Spirit will enable you to take this step, if you follow Him. Your vigilance is the sign that you want Him to guide you. Vigilance does require effort, but only until you learn that effort itself is unnecessary. You have exerted great effort to preserve what you made because it was not true. Therefore, you must now turn your effort against it. Only this can cancel out the need for effort, and call upon the being which you both have and are. This recognition is wholly without effort since it is already true and needs no protection. It is in the perfect safety of God. Therefore, inclusion is total and creation is without limit.
Journal
Jesus sums it up in this paragraph and reminds us that what we have and are is unassailable and does not need either our effort or our protection. Since we are not there yet, vigilance is still important. We know that we can be vigilant and that we can expend great effort to protect our thought system. We do this constantly to keep the separation idea in place. Now our job is to turn that effort and that vigilance to our true thought system. The Holy Spirit will enable us to do this if we simply follow Him.
I had slightly disturbing dreams right before I woke up, and that affected my mood. I lay there for a few minutes wishing I could just go back to sleep. When I got up and started moving around I noticed a vague uneasiness. I didn’t feel awful or anything, just not happy. Suddenly I remembered that this is just a choice. I can return to happiness at any time. So I did.
This is actually my job, to be happy. I experienced a significant shift recently and happiness seems to have occurred. I don’t know how this happened really, but there it is, and I like it. Even so, I have to remain vigilant for my happiness. The ego will try to assert itself and try to create a mood that seems more appropriate to the circumstances. Since this has been the way of things for as long as I can remember, I have to remain highly vigilant to stop myself from following the ego mind.
The other day I answered the ego’s call to fear and afterwards was stunned at how quickly and completely the ego mind asserted itself. At another time I would have been discouraged and fearful that I had set myself back, or maybe that I just can’t do this. It was different this time. I just looked at what had happened with the Holy Spirit.
I told Him that I didn’t know what to do with this, but He did and I was willing to hand it over to Him. These fearful stories still show up and sometimes it seems I am still attracted to them, but that is not what I want. I want to be happy. I want to remember who I am. I want to wake up. I have the means to do this through the Holy Spirit.