III. Atonement and Miracles, P 4
4 I am the only one who can perform miracles indiscriminately, because I am the Atonement. You have a role in the Atonement which I will dictate to you. Ask me which miracles you should perform. This spares you needless effort, because you will be acting under direct communication. The impersonal nature of the miracle is an essential ingredient, because it enables me to direct its application, and under my guidance miracles lead to the highly personal experience of revelation. A guide does not control but he does direct, leaving it up to you to follow. “Lead us not into temptation” means “Recognize your errors and choose to abandon them by following my guidance.”
Very clearly we are being asked to follow guidance and not to put ourselves in charge. This seems like a simple thing, but I notice that it is a habit for me to make decisions on my own and I still do this unless I am vigilant for the habit and make a conscious choice not to do so. Until yesterday I thought I was only dealing with a habit and that I understood and fully accepted the need to step back and allow myself to be led.
Yesterday I read a scribed message from Jeshua through Brent Haskell about “the script is written” and I had to confront my desire to be in charge, which is just my desire for this world and the body/personality of Myron to be real. Here is a paragraph that I think, specifically, triggered the reaction I had.
And this is part of what I have told you, but is so difficult for you. The thoughts you think you think are not real. The thoughts of which you are aware are not real thoughts. And that means this, as I have told you — The thoughts you think you think, the thoughts of the brain, if you will, the thoughts of space and time, are not real. And as such, hear me well, they have no creative power.
So can you, of your thinking, of your planning, of your struggling, of your doing things here, change anything, do anything at all? And the answer must be no. The answer must be no.
He goes on to say that there is nothing I can do in this life to change anything.
As ego, as a conscious thinking being, here, who seems to have life, and seems to have choice, and would seem to perhaps have power associated with your choices, is there anything you can do? And the answer is – no.
In this message Jeshua is saying that as my true self I am creative and thus have the power to make things happen, but as the ego self, the little Myron in this story, I have no creative power and cannot make things happen. I am not in control. I thought I knew this and was thoroughly ok with it, and so was very surprised at how upset it made me to read this. I had to let Myron grieve the loss of what she never had.
I notice this morning as I read the same thing, I don’t have any reaction and I see it clearly and am back with the program. I think that the residual (and obviously hidden) desire for the ego to be real needed to come up so that I could let more of that go. Today I see that “the script is written” is upsetting when I am identified with ego and it is only reasonable when I am identified with Spirit. As Jeshua said many of us feel this way:
“I want to make a difference. I want, when my life is over, to be able to stand tall and say, ‘I made a difference. I changed my world.’” And do you know that that is? Truly, that is but the voice of the ego crying out not to die.
So now, today, I am ready to step back. Jesus has told us that miracles are natural. When they do not occur something has gone wrong. This means I am supposed to be performing miracles all the time. But he also tells me that I should allow him to guide me in this. Jesus says that he knows where they can most effectively be applied to lead each of us home.
The script is written. The story is already told. Jesus knows the whole story and so he knows where a miracle would shorten the need for time and how that miracle would link with another. While I think I am here in this story, I see only this little bit. How would I know what is needed? That is Jesus’ job. When I think I need to make these decisions on my own I am not hurting the plan, but I am keeping ego alive in my mind by believing it is actually creative. I (as Spirit) am creative, but ego is not.
I am going to start my day from now on by asking Jesus what miracles he would have me do today. I am asking him to guide me to complete my part in the Atonement. I, as ego, cannot change this life by working in the world, But it is through this life that I let go of false beliefs and this allows me to discover and experience my true self. Jeshua reminds us that:
And that, as I have told you, is your only function, to forgive this world, to forgive yourself, to forgive your brother, to forgive me, and to forgive God Itself.
Accepting the Atonement for myself is my only function and the miracle will always be some form of forgiveness and the extension of love. “What do you want me to forgive today, Jesus? How can I experience and express love? I am ready to stop wasting my time trying to control this life and allow you to use this life to end time and bring us home. Please use me. I will do my best to remain miracle-ready by being in a state of love. I will do my best to not obstruct you. I will do my best to trust, knowing that while I see only a little you see the whole, and you know what needs to be done by me to complete my part in the Atonement.”