ACIM Daily Lesson 229. Love, which created me, is what I am.
Love, which created me, is what I am.
Lesson 229
Love, which created me, is what I am.
1. I seek my own Identity, and find It in these words: “Love, which created me, is what I am.” ²Now need I seek no more. ³Love has prevailed. ⁴So still It waited for my coming home, that I will turn away no longer from the holy face of Christ. ⁵And what I look upon attests the truth of the Identity I sought to lose, but which my Father has kept safe for me.
2. Father, my thanks to You for what I am; for keeping my Identity untouched and sinless, in the midst of all the thoughts of sin my foolish mind made up. ²And thanks to You for saving me from them. ³Amen.
I am Love. What a wonderful revelation that is!
Yes, I am Love and therefore I cannot be this body, nor can I be any of the ideas with which I have in the past identified myself. I am not Love and something else as well. As I am Love I cannot be hateful or fearful or guilty. I cannot be something that gets sick and dies. If any of these ideas enter my mind, they are in error. They do not belong to me nor do they affect who I am.
As more and more of these senseless ideas fall away, the Love I am becomes predominant in my mind. As that happens, I begin to recognize it in others. I begin to see past the story of these brothers of mine to the Christ they are. This reinforces the vision of my true Self. I pray that I notice each thought of sin. Wherever I see it, in myself or in others. I intend to let that idea be undone. Thank you my Father for saving me from my foolishness.
I am reminded of something from What Is Forgiveness?
5. Do nothing, then, and let forgiveness show you what to do, through Him Who is your Guide, your Savior and Protector, strong in hope, and certain of your ultimate success.
When I am ready for the next step, it is presented to me. Sometimes it comes as an idea and sometimes it comes through my writing.
after all, I use this writing to receive what it is I need to know. Sometimes it comes from others. When Cate Grieves posted her idea of surrendering wanting, my heart immediately opened to this. I began to instruct my mind to take note of wanting so that I could become aware of what this did to my peace of mind.
I often ask myself if I want to get my way or do I want peace?
This morning, as I was doing this work on my computer, my finger slipped from the trackpad and I fumbled with it for a moment. I felt frustration and just like that peace was lost to me. I smiled as I realized that for a moment there, I wanted my fingers to find purchase and I wanted this fumbling to stop.
How quickly wanting this took me out of peace! But how quickly I returned to peace when I decided that peace was more important to me than anything else. My fingers will slip sometimes and I can be happy anyway. This quick turnaround was a form of forgiveness. I forgave the idea that I needed everything to go smoothly this morning in order to be happy. I am ever so glad to be wrong about that and I am grateful for He Who guides me moment by moment to my certain success.
In a past journal I considered ways that I still resisted the truth that I am Love and can be nothing else.
Sometimes my mind seems filled with clouds of confusion and the effects of these confused thoughts are anger, fear, guilt, and depression. But no matter how real it seems at the time they are just clouds which can easily be dispersed as I turn my attention to the truth of my being. What a wonderful feeling to know that my mind remains unchanged and that God welcomes me home no matter how often I wander.
I am reminded of my children when they were young. They would try me over and over again, but always I just loved them. And eventually, they would stop the bad behavior. They would come sit in my lap to rest awhile in my unwavering love. Then they would be off into something else. I feel like that sometimes. I play in ego land, pretending to be something I am not and then when things get too scary or too difficult, I run back to my Father for comfort and love, and for the assurance that my Self is still intact.
This morning I was remembering one of those difficult days.
Actually, it took a couple of days to let go of the ego thoughts that held me in their sway. When that happens, it feels like I can’t find my way out of the dream. But always the real reason is that I am unwilling to let go of a favorite ego illusion. How odd that often the favored dream is an unpleasant one or leads to unpleasant effects. And yet, I still cling to it. However there is a limit to the pain I am willing to experience. Eventually, I surrendered the thought that I know the way, and allowed Holy Spirit to lead me.
I am so grateful that I am always led with certainty and love. I notice that I may be unwilling to give up certain thoughts immediately. But I am very quick to begin the process and absolutely certain that this is what I want. I have learned to love the peace and joy that comes from choosing God over the ego and the loss of that peace is acutely painful, and so my willingness speeds the process. Thank you, Holy Spirit for your ever-present help.
Here is an encouraging message I received from Holy Spirit.
This came when I was still struggling with this idea and was feeling discouraged that it seemed to be taking so long and felt so hard.
Holy Spirit: Precious one, once again I encourage you to be patient with your process. It is not a sign of failure that it takes time to move through it, but rather this is the proper use of time. Things will go faster and with less pain, if you will release the judgment you hold against yourself, and if you will simply accept what is. God does not judge you, why should you?
Until you stop judging yourself you will not believe that God judges not. It is your own judgment that you are projecting onto God and onto others in your life. When you then look within your mind for God and you see judgment, you forget that it came from your own thoughts and believe that it originated with God. How frightening that is for you, but be of good cheer for it is completely false.
Let today be a day of practice.
Practice looking on everything you do or think as perfectly innocent. Until you accept your innocence the whole world will appear to be guilty. You will experience something and immediately look around to see whose fault it was. And you will find the guilty culprit because you are projecting the guilt in your mind onto the world. You are not guilty of anything, dear one, and when you are willing to accept that truth, the world will become to you the loving place it really is. You will be in the happy dream and all about you will be proof, not of guilt, but of love.
There really is no point in all of that mind watching if you cling to the errors once you find them. Be as willing to release the errors as you were to notice them. You are not the ego, but rather the ego is a small splinter of thought in your vast and holy mind. Be willing to express your divinity, and to be as God created you. That is your true vocation. Finding the errors is only the way you reach the truth, not the end of your path. Come home to your Father Who created you for joy and for everlasting peace. As you live the life of peace and happiness that was meant for you all the separated Sons will be lifted up with you.
I am so grateful for these early messages.
They both clarified and inspired me. Learning a new way to see things took time and patience helped as I came to accept it was a process and it didn’t matter how long it took or how often I had to return to the same error. All that mattered is that I did it.
In an earlier journal, I found this entry that helped me let go of the confusion of seeing myself as the roles I play.
The problem with thinking of myself as “mother” is that this is a role that I played, but not what I am, just as being human is a role I play but not what I am. When I am too attached to these roles, they block the awareness of my true nature. This is uncomfortable because it is not natural. Another issue is that if I believe a mother is what I am, then if I am not a good mother, it must mean that I am not good.
One day, my daughter asked me to babysit for her for just an hour. Of course, it would be longer. She would have to drive back across the bridge, get her hair done, then drive back to me, so it would take, at the least, an hour and a half and probably more time. Then she would stay awhile and when she left, I would have to pick up after that little hurricane of a granddaughter.
I chose to say no and that is not always easy for me to do.
I had limited energy and way too much to do. But I felt guilty for saying no . I wished I had said yes, but I am glad I said no. It is because I still cling to the role as her mother. This makes me want to take care of her and protect her from disappointment. The good news is that I didn’t. This bit of unease is something I am willing to release. It is like a wall that stands between my Self and self. How can I know myself as Love while I feel unloving?
I am now more aware of what is natural. Thus, I feel the discomfort of the unnatural more acutely and quickly than I did before. There is a reason I didn’t give in to the discomfort of saying no. Changing the world to protect my roles is not the solution. Comfort comes in recognizing I am not my role. If I protect anything it will be my awareness of what I am.
I asked for help in understanding why these feelings linger.
I realized that as a child I felt unprotected and unsafe. These beliefs still remain in my mind and so I project them onto those I love. It is as if they are the ones who feel unprotected and unsafe. And it feels like it is my job to defend them from those feelings. All the time, the feelings are in me, not them. It is like trying to fix the mirror image and so my job is never done. Now is my opportunity to make a real difference as I let those beliefs be undone for me. Whew! I gladly and gratefully do so, now.
To enjoy the Pathways of Light Insights on ACIM Lesson 229 click here.
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