ACIM Chapter 11. V. The “Dynamics” of the Ego, P 4-6

ACIM Chapter 11. V. The “Dynamics” of the Ego, P 4-6

V. The “Dynamics” of the Ego, P 4

4 When we look at the ego, then, we are not considering dynamics but delusions. You can surely regard a delusional system without fear, for it cannot have any effects if its source is not real. Fear becomes more obviously inappropriate if you recognize the ego’s goal, which is so clearly senseless that any effort on its behalf is necessarily expended on nothing. The ego’s goal is quite explicitly ego autonomy. From the beginning, then, its purpose is to be separate, sufficient unto itself and independent of any power except its own. This is why it is the symbol of separation.

The ego’s goal is ego autonomy, to be independent of any power except its own. This is why I am surrendered to the Higher Power. As I do this practice, I am learning what it means to be fully surrendered. I am learning to surrender my thoughts, my worries, and my life.

I give this body to Jesus to use for the Atonement Plan.

So, I go where I am directed to go and say what I am directed to say. I surrender this mind to the Holy Spirit to heal. I have stopped trying to control the monkey mind with all its nonsense chatter; I have simply surrendered it to the Holy Spirit Who knows what to do with it. When the idle chatter starts up with worries and defenses, I remember I am not interested in defending myself. I have surrendered myself and so this is no longer my business.

If the ego’s goal is to be autonomous, then the way out of separation is to surrender to the other Power. So that is what I am doing. I see that it must be full surrender, holding nothing back for the ego’s use. I hesitate to surrender in those places in my life that I most need to. They are the hooks that give the ego something to hold onto. I notice that the more completely I surrender, the more peaceful and happy I am.

Here is a helpful passage from The Finders by Jeffrey Martin.

No one knows for sure exactly when the Narrative-Self makes its first appearance. It may be as early as ages two or three. Psychology research suggests this is the age that life memories begin forming. If true, then it’s hardly surprising that you probably remember its components like the voice as having always been with you, and thus confuse it with who you really are.

In his book, Jeffrey Martin uses the word Narrative-Self rather than ego. But what he points out is that we think it is who we are and this is what Jesus wants us to understand about the ego. It seems always to have been with us as a voice in our mind giving advice and interpreting everything we are aware of. Probably because in our early years, it seemed to be helpful, such as telling us to cry when we are hungry and someone will feed us, we fell into the habit of listening to and believing it.

But given just a little bit of honest inquiry, we discover it is not helpful and often harmful. The good news is that we will also discover that we are not our ego, and we don’t have to listen to, obey, or even believe in it. When this occurs, we become free of this voice. Even if we still hear it, we disregard it, and life becomes happier and more peaceful.

V. The “Dynamics” of the Ego, P 5

5 Every idea has a purpose, and its purpose is always the natural outcome of what it is. Everything that stems from the ego is the natural outcome of its central belief, and the way to undo its results is merely to recognize that their source is not natural, being out of accord with your true nature. I said before that to will contrary to God is wishful thinking and not real willing. His Will is One because the extension of His Will cannot be unlike itself. The real conflict you experience, then, is between the ego’s idle wishes and the Will of God, which you share. Can this be a real conflict?

Nothing in this world can be real because it comes from the ego which is itself not real. Just as God creates through extension, the ego makes through projection. God’s creations are like Him, and what the ego makes is like the ego. The most important part to me is that I am a creation of God, so I am like Him. The ego did not make me, so I am not like the ego. This is important to me because in my confusion, I sometimes assume that I am the ego thoughts in my mind.

I have those thoughts, but I am not those thoughts.

I think that is why, in an early lesson, Jesus refers to our thoughts this way: “The thoughts you think you think…” He describes it that way because those ego thoughts are not our real thoughts. Our real thoughts are the thoughts we think with God. All other thoughts are just wishes, which are not the same as our will. If we willed the ego stuff, it would be real, and we would really be in trouble.

We have a lot of strange wishes. Our ego thoughts are all about pain and suffering; even the ones that seem happy lead to pain and suffering. They must because they are out of accord with our true nature. I have a happy thought about my sweet children, and behind that thought is my fear for them. See how that works? Ego thoughts always, by their nature, lead to pain and suffering. And always ultimately, they lead to death.

Because I am created in the image of God, as an extension of Himself, I have His Thoughts in my mind, and I have the ability to will as opposed to wish. My will always aligns with God’s Will because I am created like Him. This is a reason to rejoice. I can wish for fear and guilt, loss and lack, loneliness, and sadness all day, and I can have an experience of anything I wish for. But I cannot will for them and so they are not real. I am safe. My experience will be one of suffering, but what I am is always safe because it is the Will of God that I am eternally safe.

V. The “Dynamics” of the Ego, P 6

6 Yours is the independence of creation, not of autonomy. Your whole creative function lies in your complete dependence on God, Whose function He shares with you. By His willingness to share it, He became as dependent on you as you are on Him. Do not ascribe the ego’s arrogance to Him Who wills not to be independent of you. He has included you in His Autonomy. Can you believe that autonomy is meaningful apart from Him? The belief in ego autonomy is costing you the knowledge of your dependence on God, in which your freedom lies. The ego sees all dependency as threatening, and has twisted even your longing for God into a means of establishing itself. But do not be deceived by its interpretation of your conflict.

I had an interesting reaction to this paragraph when I first read it. I felt a reluctance to the idea that I must give up my independence and be completely dependent on God. It was interesting because I didn’t think I would have that reaction. Well, it is an ego reaction, but I identified with it, so it affected me. I gave it to the Holy Spirit and asked Him to heal my mind of the desire to be independent of God. 

My favorite sentence is this one.  

“By His willingness to share it, He became as dependent on you as you are on Him.”  How incredible that God gave of Himself like this in my creation. How different is this snapshot of God than the picture of Him that I held for so long. When I thought that I must cling to my independence from God, I pictured a grasping, jealous, maybe even evil God who would take from me this prized possession. But if God created so generously, so fearlessly, then I am wrong about Him and wrong to be afraid of Him. If God is dependent on me then surely, I am mistaken to think I must be independent of Him. 

There is truth in my mind just behind all the ego thoughts. I long for my memory to return and, with it, my awareness of God and His all-encompassing love. I long to remember myself as fearless as God, as generous, as loving. So, I am willing to let go of the idea that I am the ego or even that the ego is part of me.  I am willing to see the ego as an idea in the mind and not one I am interested in. I am dedicated to this purpose.