Let me remember God created me.
Father, I did not make myself, although in my insanity I thought I did. Yet, as Your Thought, I have not left my Source, remaining part of Who created me. Your Son, my Father, calls on You today. Let me remember You created me. Let me remember my Identity. And let my sinlessness arise again before Christ’s vision, through which I would look upon my brothers and myself today.
Now is our Source remembered, and Therein we find our true Identity at last. Holy indeed are we, because our Source can know no sin. And we who are His Sons are like each other, and alike to Him.
Let me remember. That is all we need to do is to remember who we are. We didn’t make ourselves and we do not need to re-make ourselves. We are just reaching for a memory that is available to us. This morning, I approached my meditation a little differently, more in line with this idea. I listened to a guided meditation from Hemi Sync that was very general. Nothing to teach, just gentle reminders to bring my attention back to the present moment so as to stay out of the mind, and of course, with the Hemi Sync sounds that are so helpful.
What I did was to begin the meditation by asking the Christ Consciousness to heal in me whatever was needed at the moment. I invited Them in and I declared myself open and receptive to Their help. I expressed my gratitude that I don’t walk this path alone and that I have Their help. I invited them to also make any adjustments to this body that are needed.
Then, I simply listened to the meditation and focused as guided, knowing that the real work was being accomplished without my conscious help. Toward the end, I felt to ask Jesus to remove any remaining guilt from my mind. I absolutely will not hold a grievance against anyone because it is insane to do so. But even though it is equally insane to hold a grievance against myself, I still do that. I still bring the past into my mind to torture me. Or at least I did until very recently.
I decided it was time to release all guilt directed at myself. So, a few days ago, I went to the queen of forgiveness, Cate Grieves. I asked her how to do this since what I was doing was not working. She told me about how she did it. She did a visualization where she joined with Jesus and talked to him about this big black hole she felt she had.
She said this.
He put his hands in and around the black hole and simply drew his hands together and it was gone.
She then told me this.
I think talking with Jesus is where the answer is, Myron. He is the symbol of radiant love. His answer will be accepted by your mind. His answer is stronger than the egos. His answer will clear out even the smallest belief of guilt.
So, this is what I did and I felt so much better in every way. I see the ego trying to interest me in guilt again but I also see that I am not interested. I woke up in the night and I started thinking of two different instances when I did something I have always regretted and that usually throw me into a guilt trip. But I also noticed that I thought about those times and felt nothing. Whew. This morning, during my meditation, I went back to Jesus to tell him I want to be sure there is no guilt directed at myself and asked him to remove even the smallest belief in guilt.
Our special theme says, “There is no sin. Creation is unchanged.”
What is creation?
You are creation. What you are is what A Course in Miracles means by the word, “creation.”
For four days we are asking to remember: Let me remember what my purpose is. Let me remember that my goal is God. Let me remember that there is no sin. And today, Let me remember God created me. “Holy Spirit, please restore my memory. I am ready now.”
I think I know my goal and my purpose, that I am sinless and as God created me, and then I realize I still sometimes doubt my true Self. I hear myself say to someone that I can’t do this and I lack that, I am in fear about this, and resent that. Lack, fear, resentment, guilt, shame, judgment; these are not part of God and so they cannot be part of me.
If I still claim them then I must think that I am what I am not, and I must believe I have created myself to be different than what God created me to be. Incredible arrogance and yet I foolishly call it humility as if to say that I can undo what God has done is humility. And though this is not a sin and I am not guilty of doubting, it is something I want to relinquish.
Holy Spirit, please help me to see this clearly every day in my life. I am willing to know that I am God’s creation, not my own. I am willing to know that each person is God’s creation and that when I see them as less than that perfect creation I am indulging my arrogance again as if I were their creator. Help me to realize that when I do try to recreate this other person, I am doing so in the image of my own false creation. I am willing to empty my mind of all ego thinking about what anything is for, what anything means, what I want anything to be so that in the space I have made through this relinquishment the truth can be seen. Thank you, Holy Spirit.
For a moment this morning as I read the lesson and read my journal from 2007, I was so there. I really got it and was wonderfully surprised that I simply accept this as true with no guilt or fear. I understand that there is resistance to letting go of my desire to be my own creator, that there is a remaining desire to write more stories, but it feels like child’s play and not to be taken seriously. It is hard to say this in words and it all happened without inner commentary. These are just the words that I am putting to the feeling.
Then the ego thinking mind joined me there in that confident happy place and began its argument for helplessness and hopelessness. I saw myself judging in nearly every circumstance, looking at my brother and seeing the ego version of him. As I remembered several of these instances from just this morning as I went for my coffee I could not believe that I would ever extricate myself from my error in thinking. It is just too much. As I watch my mind pull up sin after sin for me to consider I watch my confidence and happiness flow away.
Holy Spirit: Precious one, think not that you must undo your creation through your own strength. You need only want your memory restored and through the power of God in you, it will be done. Nor is it necessary for you to look at each error one at a time and choose again. Your many errors are simply symbols of the one error. Their value lies in showing you what you want to give up and why you want to give it up, so you need only look at the many until you realize you want to give up the one.
Do not look on your errors with guilt or with fear for this gives them a solidity and seriousness they do not deserve. Rather imagine that they are just snapshots of the same thing but taken from different angles and at different times. Look at them to decide if they please you still, and if not, simply discard them as you would an out of focus picture from your album. You have a million different shots of the same thing; why would you choose to keep what does not please? Do you feel guilty when you take a picture of something then lose interest in it? Or do you simply toss that picture away?
With this daily practice, you will soon realize that none of these pictures reflect you truly, and you will simply set them all aside as one. What will be left is the one vision of the Son of God, as He was created by the Father. Those many moments of judgment are the natural effect of separation thinking, but thinking does not make it so. It simply makes it seem so. You have done nothing and when you are tired of doing nothing you will stop.
Precious child, you have merely allowed yourself to focus on the story. Turn your attention to your purpose. Let your mind dwell in that holy place. As you watch your thoughts remember why you watch them, rather than getting lost in the story.
Me: Thank you, Holy Spirit, for bringing me back to what is true and helpful.
I had a moment of success to report! I have mentioned in my journals a person who I hold a grievance against at work. I have asked the Holy Spirit to show me my lesson and have repeatedly asked Him to heal my mind about this brother. Yesterday while talking to a co-worker I started saying something negative about this man and stopped myself.
I told her that I no longer want this grievance. She argued that I was right about him and I explained to her that it doesn’t matter if I am right or wrong. I told her that my grievance isn’t hurting him or changing him, but it is hurting me. I am unhappy when I think about him and I am tired of being unhappy. I want to free him from my judgment because I want to free myself from its effect. I think it was a turning point for me and a gift to my co-worker.
I love that I can report that I have completely forgiven my brother for my projections onto him. I know it is forgiven because I not only don’t feel angry or judgmental about him, but I feel love for him. Now I have transferred my projections onto another coworker and that is what happens until we forgive the error itself.
We just keep moving judgmental thoughts around to different people and different stories until the belief that we can, and want to judge has been healed. I am confident that I will allow this to be undone in me because I see how painful it is and how it keeps me from knowing that I am in the presence of God. That price is too high for something as useless as judgment.
This year’s report: I have forgiven all grievances at work. I have forgiven myself for ever holding them. I am in love with me and with them. So maybe that means I am free to retire, leaving no unhealed relationship behind! ~big smile~
I am reading these Lesson on remembering and I feel differently about them than I have in the past. It is more of a will to remember, not a want to remember. I will hold no grievances, and when I see someone as less than the Son of God, I will to release that belief quickly and completely! Can I do this? Of course, I can and I will.