Lesson 226
My home awaits me. I will hasten there.
If I so choose, I can depart this world entirely. It is not death which makes this possible, but it is change of mind about the purpose of the world. If I believe it has a value as I see it now, so will it still remain for me. But if I see no value in the world as I behold it, nothing that I want to keep as mine or search for as a goal, it will depart from me. For I have not sought for illusions to replace the truth.
Father, my home awaits my glad return. Your Arms are open and I hear Your Voice. What need have I to linger in a place of vain desires and of shattered dreams, when Heaven can so easily be mine?
Journal
With lessons like this, I always re-evaluate my desire for this world. Do I value anything here? I notice some little things from time to time. Sometimes I still value a judgment or I notice I value something to do with the body, but there isn’t much. I am glad to be here as long as I am because it gives me time to undo what is left of these ego thoughts.
One thing I have going for me is that I don’t think that I will be happy if the world changes. I don’t believe any of my ego desires are important or will ensure my happiness. I still have ego preferences. I prefer not to suffer physically. I prefer not to be destitute. I prefer not to lose people I love. I prefer not to be friendless. I am aware of those preferences, but I don’t think of them as my goals. I don’t strive for any of that. I strive to open my heart, to get out of my head, to complete my purpose for this incarnation, to wake up, to see differently, to see through Christ vision.
Regina’s Tips
There is no reason for us to hold onto unhappiness of any kind. Only our own ideas and the value we give them create unhappiness.
What ideas are you giving value to that create your unhappiness?
Do you think things should be different than they are? Is there an ideal perfection that is not being met? Is someone acting different than you want him/her to act? Should you have something that you do not have? Is your mind full of self-condemnation, or is it highly critical of another?
When you are unhappy, pause and look. What idea is currently present and currently valued as true? Do you value this idea more than the opportunity to know the freedom of truth realization? Or are you willing to release this idea and any value you’ve given it in order to be one step closer to total freedom?
My Thoughts
Using Regina’s guidelines, I see that sometimes I am happy as I move toward awakening. I used to be impatient with my progress. I know for a fact that I can be happy right now as I do the work I came here to do, and if there are times when I feel frustrated or sad those are choices I make. There is no reason for them, just a decision I made.
It is the result of believing the ego thoughts in my mind. The ego is never satisfied and is always looking for the next best thing. Because these thoughts of failing to reach my goal soon enough are about my spiritual path, I can be temporarily fooled into thinking it is something besides ego. But the Holy Spirit doesn’t work like that. It doesn’t encourage through discouragement. That is always the ego and I don’t have to believe these thoughts.
Past Entries
I feel the draw of my home so strongly. I want so much to be there, but I know that I must first give up all value that I have in this illusion. There is nothing here that I need to sacrifice. In fact what I have learned is this. The many things I thought I would miss if they were gone caused not a ripple in my life as they left. It is not a sacrifice if something of no value is gone.
So my focus is now on noticing what still has value for me and asking the Holy Spirit for another way to see it. I want to recognize the valuelessness of it and so be free of its hold on me. If I value something, that value binds me to this world. I am always amazed that what I value is often something painful. You would think that it would require something wonderful to keep me here; but no.
This morning as I read the lesson, the word goal stood out to me. “But if I see no value in the world as I behold it, nothing that I want to keep as mine or search for as a goal, it will depart from me.” I have been holding tightly to the goal of keeping a painful idea in my mind. Now all along I have been saying that I am trying to let this idea go, but if that were truly what I was doing I would have succeeded. But the idea is still there so it must be that I still want it. So my real goal has been to hold onto the painful thought while pretending I want to be free. I love the truth. It always set me free.
Every time I see that I am holding onto something it is because I think I need something. I think I lack and that I would be better off if I had that something else. I cannot go Home while I feel a sense of neediness or lack because I cannot bring neediness or lack into my Home. There is no neediness in God. God lacks nothing. So when I think I NEED to have something or be something or do something, I see that I have placed value where there is none. When I say I am ready to let go of that painful thought I can mean it. I don’t need it. I am complete without it. And look! I am closer to home.
Dying
Do you notice that one does not even have to leave the world to be free of the world? I don’t have to die to be free. Nothing about the world has to change; only my mind must change to experience God.
In fact, dying is just another way of staying in the world (staying in the illusion). Sure, we will all lay our bodies down at some point, but that is different than dying. Dying is an attempt to escape, it is giving up, hoping that after this is something we like better. It is just another attempt to usurp God, to make your own decisions, to make plans of your own.
It is just moving from one illusion into another, to get spit back into the illusion of the world again. There is no freedom in that. It is just an endless cycle of birth and death, which is nothing at all. Laying down the body is receiving the knowledge that you are through now and it is time to go because the mind has changed and the work is done.