Lesson 214
I am not a body. I am free.
For I am still as God created me.
(194) I place the future in the Hands of God.
The past is gone; the future is not yet. Now am I freed
from both. For what God gives can only be for good. And
I accept but what He gives as what belongs to me.
I am not a body. I am free.
For I am still as God created me.
Journal
Recently, I started practicing being in the present moment. I do this during the day when I notice that I am lost in my thoughts. I bring my mind back to what is actually going on even if it is not much. For instance, if I am sitting quietly on the sofa this would normally be a time the ego mind would catch my attention with its thoughts of the past or future.
You might have noticed as I did that the ego rarely talks about peaceful moments. So, when this happens I turn my attention back to the experience of sitting quietly, listening to the sounds around me. Surprisingly, there are a lot of them. Or, I might notice the sensations in my body. Sometimes, I just notice the thoughts that come up and dismiss them, placing my attention on the spaces between the thoughts.
The result of this practice is that I am aware of the present moment a lot more than I used to be. What I have noticed is that thinking about the past and the future are not as compelling as it used to be. This is still very much a work in progress, but even the small success I have experienced thus far has made a big difference in my life.
This morning, when I read the lesson that reminds me to place the future in the Hands of God, I realize that this is what I have been doing. As I keep my attention on the present moment and as I watch my thoughts without judgment, I am not planning my future. I fill out my calendar and maybe make a list of what needs to be done, but I hold it loosely and don’t obsess about it. The future is in the Hands of God and that’s good, that’s where it belongs.
Regina’s Tips
We play God when we try to force or control circumstances to make them go ‘our way.’ Can our limited point-of-view know what is in the best interest of everyone? And yet, whenever we tamper with what is occurring, we affect ones we will never meet. No interference goes without effects we will never be aware of.
Isn’t it better to trust the benevolence of truth, to leave all things in its Hands, and practice forgiveness on circumstances that upset us? Until we know we have fully merged with God, and we have no thought or will that is apart from God, let’s leave all things to God. Let’s not entangle the unfolding with our limited and selfish ideas of what should be.
My Thoughts
The idea of non-interference in life can be a hard pill to swallow. When things were not going my way, I used to have this knee jerk reaction of trying to control the outcome. Especially when things were going badly for one of my children, I would pray for a better outcome. Now, I tend to pray for understanding, for peace of mind, for another way to see the situation.
Past Entry
I’m looking at this from two directions. First, that there is no future and no past. Over time, I have come to realize how incredibly important is this concept. When memories of past deeds come into my mind, I gently forgive and release them. Well, that is what I do in my sane moments, but I can say that I do it more and more. The past does not exist and if I am stuck in denial (re-writing the script in my mind because I hate what actually happened) or feeling guilt, regret, or fear over the situations, then I am not living at all.
If I am worried about what might happen, making plans, deciding what must be done to assure an outcome I think I prefer, I am not living at all. Living requires I be in this present moment without the intrusion of something that is not happening. I have been practicing noticing when I am in the past or future, that is, when I am nowhere since past and future do not exist. When I notice this is happening, I return to the present. Sounds simple, but is remarkably difficult to sustain this.
I have developed lazy mind syndrome. I have let the mind wander off in idle fantasies for so long that it happens all the time now. I remember as a child being completely absorbed in the moment, seldom thinking ahead or behind, so I know it can be done. I need to become as a little child again. I think the reason I love this time with Spirit every morning, listening and writing, is because I am completely in the present moment. So right now this seems like a difficult task, but I imagine what it will be like to live only in the present moment with no concerns for the past or the future and the peace and the freedom this offers me makes me think it is worth the effort.
The second idea I am looking at is that what God gives can only be for good and that I accept what He gives me. Mostly, I think in terms of all the good that comes into my life when I make room for it by letting go of the ego thoughts. Staying in the present is a great big step in that direction. The ego has no foothold in my mind if I keep my awareness on the present.
However, a few years ago, I was inspired to see something that felt, and actually still feels, very profound. I felt resistance to it because even though I understood it on some level, it seemed counter intuitive at that time. It makes more sense now. I have done what was suggested a number of times with remarkable results, but have not been disciplined in my practice. I am going to add this to my work now. I am going to place a strong focus on staying in the present moment, and in accepting everything in my life as a gift that can be used to awaken me.
Here is the message from a previous entry in my journal.
I have spent all of my life fruitlessly trying to control all events so that I can make a future that is appealing to me. It is only recently that I have approached the idea of surrender and trust. I have thought that I knew what would make me happy but I have proved over and over that I do not. I surrender the thought that I know what anything means. I surrender it completely, trusting that God knows the way Home and will direct me through His Voice that is within me. I am willing to use everything in my life for that purpose.
When I am in pain of any kind, physical or emotional, I will ask to see it differently. Why do I call it pain? That in itself is a judgment and I wonder if it could be in error? What if I simply viewed it as neutral and allowed myself to experience it with interest instead of dread, fear, or resentment? For instance, when I have gotten a headache I would think like this. “Oh no, here comes a headache. Where is the medicine? Why do I always get these awful headaches? What is wrong with me; I must not be very spiritual. I must have done something wrong, thought wrong, behaved wrong to have attracted this. I hate this headache.”
Perhaps instead I will be able to surrender all of these beliefs about headaches. Maybe I will be able to just let the headache be what it is, and just notice how it feels and what my thoughts are about it. I wonder if I could be open to the lesson the headache could teach me if I did not hate it so much? Could I, in this way understand that hate was not an appropriate response to something that is in my life to help me awaken? If I see each event as an opportunity to go Home, could I let the hate dissolve away and let it be replaced with love? Is not love a much more appropriate response to everything since love is what I am? If I am stuck in hate I am stuck in the ego.
The next time I am in pain or discomfort, instead of deciding immediately that something is wrong, I am going to practice this idea that I can trust God in everything and that there may be another way to see this. I am going to remain as open as I can to His thoughts about what is happening, knowing that anger and resentment are ego thoughts and so are never true or helpful. Holy Spirit, I am open to the idea that there is nothing in my life I cannot love and appreciate, because Love is what I am.
Holy Spirit: Sweet child, you see this correctly as you become willing to embrace all that is. Dislike, fear, guilt are all separation devices. As you are willing to see a headache or a heartache as opportunities for healing, you are seeing yourself as not separate from anything. You are not separating out an experience and saying this is not part of me and should not be here. You are not judging one thing as good and another thing as bad and so you are not making separation. Allow yourself to experience each thing in your life without resistance. When you resist anything, you resist God because there is nothing but God. Simply accept with gratitude all that shows up in your life.
Me: Holy Spirit, I am willing to practice this, but I am also afraid to say that I will not take an aspirin if I feel I need one.
Holy Spirit: Of course, you can take an aspirin if you feel the need. I have said this before. God never asks for sacrifice and if you feel that what you are doing is sacrificial, you may be certain you are listening to the ego voice rather than Mine. I will never condemn you or call you guilty, of that you may be certain. You may find that you do not need any magic to dissolve your pain, but if you do it does not matter. Simply laugh as you swallow your magic pills and do not take it seriously. Do not judge that either. Do everything with a lightness of heart, knowing that love is always the answer.
Your willingness to experience fully will allow you to experience differently. What you had seen before as pain will simply become sensation as you remove your judgment and surrender to the experience. As you learn to let go of control of the situation, what was seen as a stumbling block becomes a stepping stone. The future does not need your attention. Leave it in God’s Hands and allow your focus to be on Now. Embrace the moment and accept what is with love for the gift it brings you.