ACIM T. 3. VII. Creating versus the Self Image, P 3, 4. We have discussed the fall or separation before, but its meaning must be clearly understood.
ACIM T. 3. VII. Creating versus the Self Image, P 3, 4
3 VII. Creating versus the Self-Image, P 3
3 We have discussed the fall or separation before, but its meaning must be clearly understood. The separation is a system of thought real enough in time, though not in eternity. All beliefs are real to the believer. The fruit of only one tree was “forbidden” in the symbolic garden. But God could not have forbidden it, or it could not have been eaten. If God knows His children, and I assure you that He does, would He have put them in a position where their own destruction was possible? The “forbidden tree” was named the “tree of knowledge.” Yet God created knowledge and gave it freely to His creations. The symbolism here has been given many interpretations, but you may be sure that any interpretation that sees either God or His creations as capable of destroying Their Own purpose is in error.
A False Interpretation
I am happy to read this. Right now, I have no trouble accepting that the generally accepted religious interpretation of the fall of man is a mistake. But when I first read it, I was so relieved I cried. Believing that God tempted us to sin and then punished us for our failure was a very frightening thought. It generated in my mind many false beliefs about the nature of God.
I also resented that it set up the idea that women were, in some basic way, evil and the cause of man’s fall from grace. I think that this idea seemed entirely too convenient for men in general, and that alone caused me to doubt the Bible as the true source of God’s Word. At the very least, I doubted the interpretation, which was given by men. Did God create women for the sole purpose of giving men an excuse for bad behavior? I questioned that this was likely.
On the other hand, everybody seemed to accept this interpretation, and it is one I was taught from a very young age, so I was afraid it was true. God was manipulative and vengeful, and he had little regard for women. What a chilling vision of my Creator that was! Of course, it is only the projection of our fear that we sinned when we had the thought of separation. But before I had the Course, I didn’t know about projection. At that time in my life, I took the allegory literally and very personally.
Separation – A Faulty Thought System
The other thing in this paragraph that stands out to me is the sentence that explains what the separation really is. It is just a thought system. Separation is a belief in our mind, and that is all it is. It isn’t a true thought, so it has no true effects, and that is a relief. A thought can be changed, and if the effects are not real, then the seeming effects will disappear with the change of mind.
Even though the separation idea is not real, it seems real, and to those who are under its sway, it is real. So, while I still believe in the separation thought, I still suffer its effects as if they were real, too. I want to change my mind about separation, not because it is a sin or because I have really done anything. And I want to change my mind about separation because my belief in it is painful. I want to heal and to be at peace. I want to remember who I am and to return my whole mind to God.
4 VII. Creating versus the Self-Image, P 4
4 Eating of the fruit of the tree of knowledge is a symbolic expression for usurping the ability for self-creating. This is the only sense in which God and His creations are not co-creators. The belief that they are is implicit in the “self-concept,” or the tendency of the self to make an image of itself. Images are perceived, not known. Knowledge cannot deceive, but perception can. You can perceive yourself as self-creating, but you cannot do more than believe it. You cannot make it true. And, as I said before, when you finally perceive correctly you can only be glad that you cannot. Until then, however, the belief that you can is the foundation stone in your thought system, and all your defenses are used to attack ideas that might bring it to light. You still believe you are an image of your own making. Your mind is split with the Holy Spirit on this point, and there is no resolution while you believe the one thing that is literally inconceivable. That is why you cannot create and are filled with fear about what you make.
An Attempt at Self Creation
I am trying to create myself. That is a fact. I see myself as a body, and no matter what I say about it, that is, if I say I am a body, in a body, or pretending to be a body, I believe I am an image of my own making. Of course, I do! I am certainly not an image of God’s making, so it must be my making. It will not help me to return to my true Self if I deny what I have done.
From within this image, I continue to tweak my self-concept as I try to control my body image. For instance, I try to keep it healthy, clothe and decorate it in an effort to express my “self.” And thus, I think I can become something of my own making. I “make something of myself.” I “become the best I can be.” Maybe I take self-improvement courses, study fashion and change my hair color or style, or discover an amazing new diet.
I will never be through making myself, never be satisfied with the results, because I know (I deny it, but I know) that I have a true Self that cannot be altered. And so all my effort does nothing. I know that this made-up self, no matter how refined, is not me. It doesn’t even come close to my true self. All of these things I do are defenses against the truth. They are efforts to hold at bay the reality that I am trying to improve, something that does not exist and never has.
It Never Get’s Better
While I continue to play in the world of make-believe, I rob myself of true creation. I also scare myself. I live in uncertainty and doubt about nearly everything. Should I take this medicine or that supplement? Would it be good for me or hurt me? Studies vary. And that is just one area of uncertainty. There is nothing certain in our world, and we live with the constant, though seldom acknowledged, anxiety of not knowing.
The separation story will never get better. We will discover the cure for one disease, and another will pop up. We will find the perfect diet and exercise program combined with the most effective meditation practice, and death will claim this body, anyway. And we will form a self-governing system and change the world, and it will ultimately fall apart.
Self-Creating Experiment
Nothing will work because the idea of separation cannot work. Its destruction is built into the concept itself. It will never make us happy because it is the opposite of our natural joy and peace. It will always leave us fearful and guilty because these are components of separation and are unavoidable.
Our experiment in self-creating has had a good run, but surely it is time to set it aside. Of course, it is. That is why we are here, studying A Course in Miracles together. It is why I spend every day watching my thoughts, asking for guidance and healing. I am ready to retire as my own teacher, as my own guide, and absolutely as my own creator. All these things I do are symbolic of my growing desire to awaken from the dream of separation. I long for something I can’t quite remember.
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