ACIM Chapter 13. V. The Two Emotions, P 1, 2

ACIM Chapter 13. V. The Two Emotions, P 1, 2

V. The Two Emotions, P 1

¹ I have said you have but two emotions, love and fear. One is changeless but continually exchanged, being offered by the eternal to the eternal. In this exchange it is extended, for it increases as it is given. The other has many forms, for the content of individual illusions differs greatly. Yet they have one thing in common; they are all insane. They are made of sights that are not seen, and sounds that are not heard. They make up a private world that cannot be shared. For they are meaningful only to their maker, and so they have no meaning at all. In this world their maker moves alone, for only he perceives them.

I use my eyes to show me the world I want to see.

It is my world, complete in everything I want, and everything I don’t want is omitted. I look upon it and see that it is mine alone. How I see my child is a vision I share with no one, least of all that child. I don’t know who that one is, and if I were to write all about her and put the writing out for her to see, she would probably think that the person I wrote about had some of the same experiences she had. But I am certain that she would not recognize it as herself and would be astounded to learn I think of her in that way. She has her own world in which she images herself in the way she wants to see herself.

 You would think we would all make up amazing and perfect images, but we don’t value ourselves enough to do that. No, we project out shame, guilt, and fear onto the image and claim that instead. We made it, however, and we claim it, so we take pride in it and clutch it to us as if it were valuable. Have you ever heard two people arguing over who was the worst person, dragging the past forward to prove their claim? Maybe even heard yourself doing something like this? I was sicker; my surgery lasted longer, my workplace the worst, my finances in greater disarray, and my children the least grateful, all proof that I love my dysfunction and claim it proudly.

 Never mind it is painful.

Pain becomes pleasure in our confused minds, and we keep adding to our litany of suffering because we have taught ourselves there is some value in it. We cannot live if we have nothing to live for, so our mind finds areas in which it will excel and it grasps at these bits of pleasure and holds them up to prove its worth. Defending this self-image, both the seemingly good and the bad becomes a bloody battle that only adds to a personal, private world. And the competition, the blame, the attack and defend mode, grow and take over our lives. We get so accustomed to feeling like this that we think it is normal, and we don’t even question it.

 When we begin to feel the draw of Heaven, we begin to question what has always seemed normal and expected. All help and guidance we need is given to us. We are helped to find our way out of the quagmire of thoughtless thoughts that drag us deeper into the illusion of life. It comes as A Course in Miracles or some other nondual path to help us with this. We begin to vibrate at different levels, so we are more attuned to the Higher Realm and can hear our guidance more clearly. This leads us inevitably to a realization of oneness and away from the desire to be separate. Our little personal kingdoms lose their glamour as we see them for what they are: pits of suffering, pain, and death.

 What becomes crystal clear is that the lower mind, the ego, is interested in fear and the higher mind knows only love.

It also becomes clear that God is Love and God is One and so to return our mind to that blissful existence we must know ourselves as part of that Oneness and then we will know only love. In love there is no fear and thus no suffering and no death. There is only happiness, joy, freedom, and other aspects of love, but to want that, we must let go of what we used to value.

I cannot be in Love’s presence if I am still attacking His Son, not one of my brothers and not myself. Nor can I bring a fancy house, big car, and pile of money as proof of worthiness, as proof that I won. I cannot bring this into the Kingdom. I cannot bring my sorrows and my victimhood and suffering. As if this is proof that I am indeed the lowest of them all. It is an error to think I should stand cringing before God, hoping I have already suffered enough, hoping He will see my suffering is greater than the others and turn to them instead. I must let it all go, all value in anything except love and oneness, and come empty-handed to Love. I must come with my brothers neither behind nor before me but beside me.

V. The Two Emotions, P 2

2 Each one peoples his world with figures from his individual past, and it is because of this that private worlds do differ. Yet the figures that he sees were never real, for they are made up only of his reactions to his brothers, and do not include their reactions to him. Therefore, he does not see he made them, and that they are not whole. For these figures have no witnesses, being perceived in one separate mind only.

For me to understand this paragraph’s significance, I had to say it in first person. That could be helpful to others as well. So, I said to myself: “Each of us people our world with figures from our individual past, and it is because of this that private worlds do differ.” I people my world with figures from my past, and it is because of this that private worlds do differ. I see that I do seem to have a private world different from other people’s world.

Sure, we have some common features, but we have many different features, and even those we have in common are experienced differently. Even my close family members have a different world, a private world different from mine. I listen to my siblings talk about their childhood sometimes, and it is so different from what I remember that I barely recognize it. I want to say, “Wait, that’s not what happened!” But of course, they would say the same to me.

“Yet the figures that I see were never real.

They are made up only of my reactions to my brothers and do not include their reactions to me.” So, even the figures that seem real to me are not so. This is because they are one-dimensional. I see only what I think of them, my reactions to them. I don’t include their reactions to me.

My mind wants to argue with this. Many times, I watch very closely for the other person’s reaction to me. In fact, I seem to care more about their reaction to me than I do about them. But I am not really seeing their reaction to me. I am seeing my interpretation of their actions and words. For instance, I was talking to my brother and he had this look on his face.

I thought it meant that he was unhappy with what I was saying. I felt judged and found wanting. It turns out he was concerned about something that had nothing to do with me. It was not my brother who upset me. He was not judgmental of me at all. It was my interpretation of his look that upset me. So, I do see that they are not who they are in my vision of them. They are only who I think they are.

And thus, everything I think about them is a reflection of myself.

Do I never really look at anyone? Or do I just look at myself as I imagine I appear in their eyes? I have a picture in my mind of who my younger daughter is, and I know my picture does not match hers. I know this because of our conversations. Also, I have had conversations with my older daughter about the younger one, and her picture does not match mine or that of her sister. Her brothers also have a different idea of who she is.

If you were trying to discover who this woman is and asked her family members, her friends, and perhaps her fiancé, except for a few facts about her existence, you would get very different stories. You might think she is a compilation that each person adds to your picture of her, but really, you would get a compilation of the people you talk to because each one is giving you a reflection of their own mind.

In other words, I don’t know who my daughter is; I only know my thoughts about her, and my thoughts are always going to be about how she fits into my personal world. I have no whole picture of anyone because I see each of them through the filter of my beliefs and my imagined needs. I know only how they impact my personal universe. This is true for all of us. No wonder we feel separate and alone.

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