Judgment and love are opposites. From one
Come all the sorrows of the world. But from
The other comes the peace of God Himself.
Forgiveness looks on sinlessness alone, and judges not. Through this I come to You. Judgment will bind my eyes and make me blind. Yet love, reflected in forgiveness here, reminds me You have given me a way to find Your peace again. I am redeemed when I elect to follow in this way. You have not left me comfortless. I have within me both the memory of You, and One Who leads me to it. Father, I would hear Your Voice and find Your peace today. For I would love my own Identity, and find in It the memory of You.
This morning as I read this lesson and my past entries, I am reflecting on how I have changed in regard to judgment. What I see is that judgmental thoughts still come into my mind but I am not very interested. Occasionally, I will notice that I am judging people or situations and I will stop. I recognize that I am never upset for the reason I think, so I ask what it is that is upsetting me, rather than continuing to project my discontent on others, and I ask that this be healed. I like that it happens seldom enough that I am surprised by it. Whatever it is about, it is a sign that I have abandoned love and as soon as I realize this, I change my mind.
I still judge all the time. I know I am judging because I still see the world defined by opposites. It seems I cannot stop myself from doing this, but it is helpful as I notice when I do it and then bring my willingness to love to the situation. More and more I see that willingness is all that is asked of me and all that it takes to undo judgment. I cannot call this hard work. The only reason it ever appears hard to me is that I still have resistance in some areas. I still think there is some value in judging. I still want to believe that some things are better than other things. I give my willingness to see this differently.
I am going to work and this morning I want to write instead. I want to send Christmas cards. I want to catch up on some work here at the house. I am judging one activity as better than another. As I become willing to see this differently, I am given the gift of seeing the whole day stretched before me for the sole purpose of practicing my willingness to release my desire to judge and so to allow the Love that is God to flow through me. This can happen anywhere, at home certainly, but just as easily at work. Remembering my purpose, which is to forgive, I remember not to value the valueless, and I have nothing to judge. Thank you, Holy Spirit, for clarifying that for me.
I went to a comedy show last night and stayed up past my bedtime. This morning I notice my energy level is low and I also noticed that I judged this as being a bad thing. The mind began to make up stories about what this means in terms of my day, how it will affect my plans, etc. Then I was given the thought of acceptance. I remembered the last time I felt like this, and I chose to just let it be, to accept that this is how I feel without judging it or trying to do anything about it. Having low energy is one thing, judging it as unacceptable and going to war with it is quite different.
Thank you, Holy Spirit.
This judgment thing is a tough nut to crack. I still see lots of judgment thoughts in my mind. On the other hand, I don’t have any judgment thoughts I am not willing to release, though some of them seem to be more appealing to me than others. Those are the ones that feel “hard” to let go. I’m focused on simply noticing and then letting go of judgment where it still has a hold on me.
If I am not careful, I will judge myself for judging and that is not at all helpful. As I let go of judgment I am beginning to understand that we can have judgment or love, but not both. Where there is judgment there is not love. There is no justification for holding onto a judgment, no matter what story I have weaved around it to convince me of its value. I also see that, like everything else, it is a matter of desire. The stronger my desire to know God, the easier it is to let go of judgment.