I can be hurt by nothing but my thoughts.
Father, Your Son is perfect. When I think that I am hurt in any way, it is because I have forgotten who I am, and that I am as You created me. Your Thoughts can only bring me happiness. If ever I am sad or hurt or ill, I have forgotten what You think, and put my little meaningless ideas in place of where Your Thoughts belong, and where they are. I can be hurt by nothing but my thoughts. The Thoughts I think with You can only bless. The Thoughts I think with You alone are true.
I will not hurt myself today. For I am far beyond all pain. My Father placed me safe in Heaven, watching over me. And I would not attack the Son He loves, for what He loves is also mine to love.
This is a lesson I completely understand and accept. The thoughts I think I think, that is, the thoughts I think with the ego mind, hurt me. It is only these thoughts that hurt me. I am not hurt because someone says something unkind to me. I am not hurt because my job is threatened. I am not hurt because the body is sick. I am hurt only by my thoughts.
First I am hurt by my thoughts because they are the source of all my life experiences. My thoughts are images I have made and projected outward to become the story of the life of Myron. For instance, if I hold onto the belief in guilt I will have lots of guilt stories show up as my life. I am guilty or they are guilty, either way, it is the same thing; I believe in guilt. I believe that guilt is a real thing, a creation of God and that I am under its laws.
Then the second time I hurt myself with my thoughts is when the story shows up and I decide what it means. If I ask the ego mind what it means, I will feel guilty for having this in my life and guilt brings fear. Now I am guilty and fearful. If instead, I ask the Holy Spirit what it means, I will become aware of my real thoughts, the thoughts I think with God, and I will learn to dismiss the ego thoughts of guilt and fear. I may hear them, but with the guidance of the Holy Spirit, I will disregard them.
I am being taught that guilt is not real and as this occurs, there are fewer guilt thoughts to project as guilt stories in my life. My life becomes more peaceful and happier, but not because my life has changed. My life has changed, but it is because my thoughts have changed. My life is just a projection of those thoughts. Always, all healing occurs at the level of the mind.
As I have begun to accept that I am not Myron at all and that I am the Son of God having a virtual experience as Myron, I have had some confusion. I have played around just a little with controlling the outcome of things. I find myself very reluctant to do this because I am still able to fall back into ego thinking, and I don’t want to encourage ego to think it is in control of anything.
So I am being cautious and careful. I know that at some point I must step completely out of the idea of me as Myron, and step fully into my true self. What seems to be coming to me is that if I keep asking my Guide what everything means and I keep asking my Guide how to live in this world I made, the transition will take care of itself.
An example of how this is working occurred last night. I had a terrific day as I allowed Love to guide me, but toward the end of the day, the ego mind rebelled and I slowly slid down that rabbit hole. The way I could see this happening is that I felt out of control of my own thinking and behavior. I felt emotional. I worried about things. This was not a strong reaction as it has been in the past, but it was there.
This morning, I woke up thinking about that. I had an instant of concern and then I was completely at ease. I am the Son of God and have nothing to be concerned about. Nothing happened anywhere except in a confused and dreaming mind. My ego thinking and my ego actions are irrelevant. I see some ideas that still hook me, but that is good. I can use the rules for decision to see them differently. I am back on track to deciding to remember who I am.
So I am not sitting around deciding to be rich and beautiful and healthy. What I am doing is I am watching my thoughts as always, but without so much angst, and with a greater certainty that I want to know the Thoughts that I share with God. When fearful thoughts of lack come into my mind, I know it cannot be God’s Will that I suffer in any way and so I must be thinking with ego. I ask my Guide to reinterpret this.
When I feel sick I know that cannot be what God wants for me and so I ask my Guide to heal my mind of these insane thoughts that are being projected as sickness. When I feel like I am out of control, my Guide shows me another way to see this. I realize that I am in control after all, just that I decided to follow ego’s plan awhile. I accept the Atonement for that decision and I start over, this time with my Guide.
Things are moving faster now and going more smoothly, the side trips into ego land are shorter and less intense. This is because I have chosen to practice following my Guide rather than ego until it has become a reliable habit, and now it is a natural and desirable thing to do. I still fall short of perfection, but I am learning to master this way of living in the world while waking up.
For a while there, I thought I would never get rid of guilt. It was such a persistent thought in the mind. Lately, though, I have been aware of guilt and simply ignored it. Ha! It really is that simple. It has no meaning other than what I give it, and I have stopped giving it meaning. I don’t know if this is completely done, but there has been a huge shift in my thinking when it comes to guilt.
Another change is this. I ask myself frequently now why I am here. What is my purpose? It certainly isn’t to get lost in the story of Myron’s life. My purpose is not to live a more interesting or entertaining life. It isn’t even to live a better life. It is to wake up from the delusion that this is living. It is to remove the veil, to see what is really here, and then to help others see this. As Jesus phrases it in the Course, I am to save the world, not fall into its hypnotic trance.