It is amazingly easy to get distracted from my purpose even now that I know that purpose, even now that I am tired of the stories and mostly uninterested in them. Sometimes I will just notice that I am sad and I will wonder why and the ego scrambles to make up a story to explain the sadness. And I either listen to the story and follow it to the next and the next, or I realize it is just a distraction, a choice to remain in the prison I built to keep me separated.
What I do as often as I can is to stop the story telling as quickly as possible. I feel sadness welling up and instead of asking the ego mind what it means, I ask Holy Spirit. Holy Spirit never takes me into a story. He doesn’t help me to remember something sad that happened in the past, or how badly I was treated, or how lonely I plan to be when some imagined future arrives. This is all ego territory. One story is the same as the next.
I ask the Holy Spirit about my sad feelings and He brings me true thoughts, the thoughts I share with God, or at least thoughts that are symbolic of the thoughts I share with God. He reminds me of my holy purpose, which is to save the world and to awaken us to our true Selves. And as these ideas are met with openness and willingness, something happens that has nothing to do with words. There is a miracle as the mind is healed and emotion is washed away; peace takes its place.
The ego offers me sad stories and little dramas. But the peace of God is everything I want. The ego chatters away in my mind with endless past moments and more of the same projected as future moments, all for my entertainment; a roller coaster ride of endless thrills and chills and heartbreaking moments. But the peace of God is everything I want.
I sit in that peace this morning and I feel insulated from the world that seems determined to tear my peace from me, but I laugh with the Holy Spirit at that thought. As if there was a world outside my mind that could do anything to me. The world challenges me and attacks me whether I get out of this chair or not. Or the world cherishes me and protects me from this same place, according to what I want.
The world is in my mind and nowhere else and it gives me exactly what I want regardless of where I place this body in the world. In those moments of choice, when I am deciding what story I am going to experience now, I remind myself that the peace of God is everything I want. I remind myself that I am awake if I care to throw off my imagined chains and have that experience. What I tell myself seems to be very important, so I ask the Holy Spirit to watch my thoughts with me, and direct them to the truth.